I've started this post about 4 times over the past month and a half, but it never felt like quite the right timing. Now I think we're ready to announce it.
Since the beginning of September we have been exploring the wide (slow/time consuming) world of adoption. It's been an interesting ride already, but we've seen God working already.
Last night we finally made our decision about what kind of adoption we're going to have and what agency we're going to go with! Whoohoo, it was quite a lot of soul searching and mind changing while we tried to seek God's will for our lives in even this small step.
I've read SO MANY great blogs and books on the subject that I'm feeling really inadequate when it comes to writing about it myself. But, I really want to document our journey if for no other reason than to look back at it one day and be able to explain to our child how we felt as we made these decisions.
I guess I'll just start from the very beginning.
From the time I was young I always knew I wanted to have a lot of kids. I've always enjoyed caring for kids and loved the chaos that comes along with it. I remember at the baby shower for Xavier there was a game that everyone had to either say how many kids they had or how many they wanted and my answer was 5. For some reason I knew I was suited for a large family (even though I don't really consider 5 THAT big).
Well 12 years has gone by and we're at 4.
Now this is usually when people ask me "Why don't you just have another one of your 'own'." Honestly, it's because we want to be able to help someone else out, even if it's as simple as just giving a person an different option besides aborting their baby. I'll admit that wasn't MY first motive though. At first I didn't really know exactly WHY I felt like we could or even should adopt. I'm pretty sure every why you are thinking I've thought of and questioned myself with.
But in the end it all comes down to what I'm willing to do to live out the gospel in my life. Adoption is a very real picture of God's mercy given to Christians by allowing us to join His family.
23 Before this faith came, we were held prisoners by the law, locked up until faith should be revealed. 24 So the law was put in charge to lead us to Christ that we might be justified by faith. 25 Now that faith has come, we are no longer under the supervision of the law.26 You are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus, 27 for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. 28 There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. 29 If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise.
We didn't start this process even considering taking an infant (but let's be real, there's no way we wouldn't want one!) but as doors opened and closed we've decided it will be the best for our family. We really love the adoption model our agency uses (they spend a lot of time and energy on their birthmothers and make sure she really understands what adoption means), and since they deal with domestic (USA) infant adoption that's what we're going to do.
Honestly, I'm pretty excited to hopefully meet the birth mom and build a relationship that I normally would never have had. I think our past can really help us to understand what she/they are going through. So that's where we are currently. From everything we've read it could be a very long process, but thankfully it's not really up to our timing anyway.
I've read some really REALLY amazing books that I would encourage anyone who has even an inkling to adopt to read.
There's also some really great blogs out there (much better attended and well written than this one).
My two favorites are:
-I love and agree whole heartedly with how she explains why they chose domestic infant adoption
-If you want to cry watch "Mareto's Gotcha Video" (I can't watch it without tearing up)
I still haven't found a blog with a family with children who isn't dealing with infertility but just wants to obey God yet. But, I'm hoping to come across one soon. I know there's more of us out there..somewhere.